The Fame Game
by Rupert Brown
Summary: Miranda’s jealous of Lizzie’s sudden success; Matt outwits a vindictive classmate. Written in Screenplay Format. Fictional "Third Season".
1. Default Chapter

COLD OPENING:

FADE IN:  
INT. DIGITAL BEAN-DAY

We see GORDO at the counter when up comes MIRANDA to sit next to him, excited.

MIRANDA  
(excited)  
You'll never guess what happened.

GORDO  
Lip gloss is half off at the mall...

MIRANDA  
I'm serious Gordo.

GORDO  
So shoot.

MIRANDA  
You're looking at the lead in the new school musical.

GORDO  
(worried)  
As in, on stage? Uh, you do remember the last time you tried that?

CLIP: RANDOM ACTS OF MIRANDA  
Miranda being a bad actress.

BACK TO SCENE

MIRANDA  
(unconcerned)  
Gordo, it's a musical. I sing. No worries.

GORDO  
Well, hey. Congratulations.

MIRANDA  
Thank you, thank you.

At that moment enter LIZZIE, who is also excited.

LIZZIE  
You'll never believe what happened!

GORDO  
Already know.

LIZZIE  
(confused)  
You do?

MIRANDA  
Yep. I got the lead in the school musical.

LIZZIE  
Oh, really? That's great Miranda. But that's not what I wanted to tell you guys.

MIRANDA

So, spill.

LIZZIE  
(excited)  
Gemstar Records called. They saw me at the International Music Video Awards and-get this-they want to sign me to a recording deal!

GORDO  
(stunned)  
A record deal? As in money?

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
Fame, fortune, here I come!

GORDO  
Wow Lizzie. That's great.

LIZZIE  
I know. I'm so excited!

While Lizzie's happy and Gordo's happy for her, a strange cast has come over Miranda's features.

MIRANDA  
Yeah Lizzie, that's fantastic...

GORDO  
So, when does all this happen?

LIZZIE  
The record company's having the papers drawn up right now. My first session is next week.  
(beat)  
Of course, I want you guys to be there with me.

MIRANDA  
You bet...

While happy for Lizzie, the 'green eyed monster' is starting to take root in Miranda.

FADE OUT:

END OF COLD OPENING


	2. Act I

ACT I 

FADE IN:  
INT. MIDDLE SCHOOL-HALLWAY-DAY

We see MATT and LANNY walking between classes.

MATT  
So what if my dorky sister is a pop star? When 'Entertainment Tonight' comes a callin' I'll be all set...

Lanny and Matt share mischievous glee.

But their amusement is soon broken up by the arrival of PATRICIA FARNSWORTH, the stodgy student that has it in for Matt. Lanny scowls.

PATRICIA  
Planning some other act of fiendish impetuousness' I see.

MATT  
Actually, we were discussing how nice you look today.

PATRICIA  
I'm sure.

MATT Your dentist did an excellent job...

PATRICIA  
(confused)  
My dentist? What are you talking about?

MATT  
From this angle I can hardly see your fangs!

Matt and Lanny crack up.

PATRICIA  
Ha, ha. Very funny. I'm watching you McGuire! One of these days you'll trip up and I'll be there!

Patricia stomps off as Matt and Lanny are still laughing.

CUT TO:  
EXT. MCGUIRE HOME-BACKYARD-DAY

SAM and JO are painting patio chairs as we hear music in the background coming from the house.

SAM  
I don't know about this recording contract Jo. I mean, do we really want our daughter becoming a pop star?

JO  
Lizzie's found something she's passionate about. We can't just take that away from her Sam.

SAM  
I know, but a pop star? That's a rather sizable undertaking...

JO  
It's what she wants to do, and she's good at it. We have to support her.

SAM  
But still, being a professional singer at such a young age...

JO  
She's 15 now Sam. We have to learn to accept that our little girl is growing up...

Knowing what is coming, Sam puts down his paint brush and pulls out a handkerchief which he gives to Jo, who blows her nose with it.

JO  
Thank you.

CUT TO:  
INT. HIGH SCHOOL-CAFETERIA-DAY

Gordo's in the lunch line when who should slide up next to him but KATE.

KATE  
Everyone's talking about Lizzie's recording contract! Isn't it great?

GORDO  
Yeah.

KATE  
Speaking of Lizzie, where is she?

GORDO  
Her and Miranda had to go check on something they're baking for Home Ec class.

CUT TO:  
INT. HIGH SCHOOL-HOME ECONOMICS CLASSROOM-DAY

Lizzie and Miranda are watching over a souffle the two are baking for the class.

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
Who should I do my first celebrity duet with? J-Lo or Britney?

LIZZIE  
This is so awesome Miranda! I have a record deal, you're staring in a musical; we have harmony coming out of our ears.

MIRANDA  
(subdued)  
Yeah, that's great...

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
Maybe it's just me, but that, "that's great" didn't sound so, well, great.

LIZZIE  
Is there something wrong Miranda?

MIRANDA  
Huh? Oh, no. Everything's fine Lizzie. So, how's the souffle coming?

Miranda peers into the oven, avoiding Lizzie's glance.

LIZZIE  
You sure everything's all right?

MIRANDA  
Yeah, totally... So, you excited about cutting an album?

LIZZIE  
Are you kidding? Try terrified!

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
I think I can! I think I can! I think I can!

MIRANDA  
You'll be great at it Lizzie. You always are...

LIZZIE  
(confused)  
Huh? What'd you mean?

MIRANDA  
You're a success at everything you try. Modeling...

CLIP: LAST YEAR'S MODEL  
Lizzie's strutting her stuff on the runway.

MIRANDA  
(V.O)  
Politics...

CLIP: ELECTION  
Lizzie whipping up the support of her fellow students.

MIRANDA  
(V.O)  
Even gymnastics.

CLIP: I'VE GOT RHYTHMIC  
Lizzie doing her rhythmic gymnastic routine.

BACK TO SCENE

MIRANDA  
Now it's singing.

LIZZIE  
Are you kidding? I couldn't take modeling...

CLIP: LAST YEAR'S MODEL  
Lizzie purposely blowing her modeling career.

LIZZIE  
(V.O)  
I lost the election.

CLIP: ELECTION  
Lizzie's shock as Tudgeman is declared class president.

LIZZIE  
(V.O)  
And I couldn't stand rhythmic gymnastics.

CLIP: I'VE GOT RHYTHMIC  
Lizzie giving up on gymnastics.

BACK TO SCENE

MIRANDA  
Whatever.

LIZZIE  
Miranda! If there's something bothering you, out with it.

MIRANDA  
I said I was fine, okay? Let's just drop it.

An uncomfortable silence hangs in the air.

We see Animated Lizzie in an astronaut suit, floating around in space.

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
Houston, we have a problem.

CUT TO:  
EXT. MIDDLE SCHOOL-DAY

Matt and Lanny are hiding behind a tree snickering. In Matt's hand there's a water balloon. And in his sights there's a teacher.

MATT  
(gleefully)  
This was brilliant Lanny! After one of these babies, Mr. Pettus will be soaked, which means he'll have to change clothes-which means that there won't be time left for that 'pop quiz'!

But as the duo stand there sizing up their 'prey', up from behind comes Patricia. Deftly, she swoops the balloon out of Matt's hand.

MATT  
(surprised)  
Hey! What's going on?

PATRICIA  
This little incident. That's what's going 'on'-your permanent record that is!

PATRICIA (CON'T)  
I told you I'd catch you one day McGuire. Throwing a water balloon at a teacher? Oh, I'd say that's good for at least a week's suspension.

She starts hefting the balloon up and down while she's on a verbal role. But as she's rattling on, Matt sees PRINCIPAL TWEEDY coming up behind her-thus seeing a way to turn the situation to his advantage.

MATT  
(acting)  
Don't do it Patricia!

PATRICIA  
(confused)  
What?

MATT  
You can't throw that at Mr. Pettus! It's wrong!

PATRICIA  
What are you-

MATT  
(to Principal Tweedy)  
I tried to stop her, but she won't listen to reason!

Patricia turns around-still with the incriminating water balloon in her hand.

PATRICIA  
(stammering)  
Principal Tweedy! You don't understand. Matt-

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
(interrupting)  
I know what Mr. McGuire was doing.

PATRICIA/MATT  
You do?

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
I do. He was not only trying to prevent a heinous act of juvenal delinquency, but he was trying to shield you from the consequences that would've resulted of this act.

PATRICIA No! That's not-

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
(to Matt)  
Mr. McGuire, you should be commended.

MATT  
(false modesty)  
No, really, it was nothing...

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
No, no. It's fine upstanding students such as yourself that give educators like me hope for the future.

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
(to Patricia)  
As for you young lady, a talk with your parents seems to be in order.

As Patricia is led away sputtering, Matt and Lanny silently crack up laughing.

CUT TO:  
INT. HIGH SCHOOL-LIBRARY-DAY

Miranda is doing research for a school project among the book stacks when Gordo shows up to help her.

GORDO  
Started without me I see.

MIRANDA  
Sorry. I wanted to get a jump on this stuff.

As Gordo buckles down, he tactfully brings up Lizzie and Miranda's moment of tension.

GORDO  
So... Lizzie told me about what happened during lunch.

MIRANDA  
(non-committal)  
Mmmm...

GORDO  
You want to talk about it?

MIRANDA  
Not really. Can we just get started on this?

Gordo focuses on Miranda.

GORDO  
Listen. You're one of my best friends, right?

MIRANDA  
(reluctantly)  
Yeah...

GORDO  
And I'm yours, right?

MIRANDA  
Yeah.

GORDO  
So as your best friend I'm asking you to tell me what's going on. That's what friendship is all about.

Touched, yet still reluctant, Miranda wades into the issue.

MIRANDA  
It's just... I'm supposed to be the singer Gordo. Me. Music is supposed to be my talent!

GORDO  
You can't both be singers?

MIRANDA  
I've worked for it Gordo. I've taken violin lessons. I've taken voice classes. I've performed in concerts. I've had to develop and work for every inch. And what has it got me?

GORDO  
The respect and admiration of your peers?

MIRANDA  
No! Nothing. Bupkiss. Nada.

GORDO  
I wouldn't call playing for the governor nothing...

MIRANDA  
Compared to Lizzie? I bust my butt to get where I am and what happens? Fame, fortune, and talent all falls into Lizzie's lap. She didn't even do anything! That should be my recording contract Gordo! Mine!

Gordo's quiet as they both digest Miranda's jealousy.

MIRANDA (CON'T)  
(dejected)  
Let's just get this done.

As the somber duo settles down to work we pan away.

FADE OUT:

END OF ACT I


	3. Act II

ACT II

FADE IN:  
INT. MIDDLE SCHOOL-CAFETERIA-DAY

Matt and Lanny are seated at a table gazing enraptured at a banana cream pie.

MATT Banana cream pie.  
(beat)  
Forgot the forks.

The two go and get the appropriate utensils. But when they get back to their table they witness an unexpected and potentially ugly site-Patricia.

PATRICIA  
You scurrilous reprobate! Thought it was funny letting me take the fall for something you were about to do, didn't you?

MATT  
(earnest)  
Well, yeah actually...

Lanny nods his agreement.

PATRICIA  
Do you realize that because of you I've been grounded for two weeks? Me, grounded!

As she's talking, she eyes the cream pie and takes hold of it menacingly. A wicked smile comes to her face.

PATRICIA  
So, you like pie do you...

MATT  
Now, Patricia, let's not do anything hasty...

He and Lanny slowly back up.

PATRICIA  
Take this McGuire!

With a strangled cry, she throws the pie. Matt and Lanny duck and instead of hitting them, it hits someone who just came through the cafeteria doors. Wiping the pie from his face, that person is revealed to be none other than Principal Tweedy!

PATRICIA  
(horrified)  
Principal Tweedy!

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
Miss Farnsworth. My office. Now.

PATRICIA  
But I-I-

Patricia looks on helplessly as she's led away. Matt and Lanny laugh and laugh.

CUT TO:  
INT. RECORDING STUDIO-LOBBY-DAY

Enter Sam, Jo, Lizzie, Miranda, and Gordo.

GORDO  
(looking around)  
So, this is what a real recording studio looks like. Cool.

JO  
(to reception girl)  
Hi. We're here for Lizzie McGuire's recording session.

RECEPTIONIST  
(smiling)  
If you could just sign in, I'll let them know you're here.

As Jo signs them in, Sam scopes out the complimentary nuts on the coffee table.

SAM  
Hey, cashews.

LIZZIE  
(excited)  
I can't believe that I'm actually here! Isn't it exciting Miranda!

MIRANDA  
You bet...

LIZZIE  
Just think. Me, a recording star. It's just too much!

MIRANDA  
You can say that again...

LIZZIE  
What?

MIRANDA  
Nothing.

A lull develops in the conversation.

SAM  
(looking about)  
I wonder how much this all costs?

JO  
Sam!

SAM  
I'm just curious, that's all.

JO  
Just eat your nuts.

GORDO  
(to Lizzie and Miranda)  
I bet a place like this is always on the lookout for new music video directors...

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
When I'm rich and famous Gordo can be my personal shoot director. And Miranda can be my stylist. And of course, I'll have to find something for Kate to do.

MIRANDA  
So, how long's it gonna be before someone comes down?

But even as she's saying it, an elevator opens to reveal a RECORD EXECUTIVE.

RECORD EXECUTIVE  
Sorry to keep you waiting. If you'll follow me, I'll take you up to the studio.

CUT TO:  
INT. RECORDING STUDIO-RECORDING ROOM-DAY

At a bank of electronic equipment there are two technicians.

RECORD EXECUTIVE  
(to Lizzie)  
This is Ted and Steve. They're sound technicians, and they'll be working with you today.

LIZZIE  
Okay.

RECORD EXECUTIVE  
Now obviously this'll just be the first of many sessions. What we're looking for today is just to get down the general rhythm of your performance. Your specific 'feel'. You get it?

LIZZIE  
Yeah. I think so.

RECORD EXECUTIVE  
Great. We'll just have the boys here do one last check to make sure everything is functioning correctly, then we'll be ready to go.

As everyone waits, Gordo pulls Lizzie aside.

GORDO  
Lizzie. I've got to tell you something.

LIZZIE  
Can it wait Gordo? I'm about to start recording.

GORDO  
It's about Miranda, and why she's been acting so strange lately.

LIZZIE  
(imploringly)  
Dish.

GORDO  
(uncomfortable)  
She's jealous.

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
(doing a double take)  
Wha?

LIZZIE  
What are you talking about Gordo?

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
Miranda jealous of me? Uh, hello. Did I just step into some bizarre parallel universe or something?

LIZZIE  
Why would Miranda be jealous of me?

GORDO  
Because of this.

He indicates the whole recording building.

LIZZIE  
My recording contract?

GORDO  
Not just that, but singing period. Miranda kinda resents the fact that it's all come to you so easily...

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
(incredulous)  
Easy? You call having to impersonate an Italian pop star in front of millions of people easy!

LIZZIE  
Gordo!

Gordo throws up his hands.

GORDO  
Hey, I didn't say I agreed with her. I'm just reporting the situation.

LIZZIE  
(confused)  
So Miranda's jealous that I'm good at the same thing she is?

GORDO  
And that it seems to have come easier to you.

LIZZIE  
But that doesn't make any sense.

GORDO  
Don't tell me. I just thought you should know.

As Lizzie's trying to digest this, the sound technicians have finished up their checks.

RECORD EXECUTIVE  
We're ready for you Lizzie. Just step through here to the recording booth and we'll be all set.

Full of worry, Lizzie walks into the adjoining room. She can see everyone thanks to the glass window separating the two rooms.

RECORD EXECUTIVE (CON'T)  
Okay Lizzie, you see that sheet music in front of you? That's one of our label's hits-you might recognize it.

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
Recognize it? Try 'own the CD'!

RECORD EXECUTIVE  
What we want you to do is sing along with the audio track first to get an idea of your range. After that we'll have you run through it again, only this time without the music.

RECORD EXECUTIVE (CON'T)  
That way we'll be able to gauge not only your range, but your individual style. Once we have a handle on the two, we can then begin to figure out what kind of CD we want to make. Understand?

Lizzie, nervously, nods.

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
(panicking)  
Maybe Miranda's right. Maybe this has all been too easy. What if my album flops? I'll be the laughing stock of millions. Goodbye fame, hello loserdom!

RECORD EXECUTIVE  
So, whenever you're ready.

CLOSE ON: Lizzie's troubled face.

LIZZIE  
Um, c-can we hold on a minute?

The record executive cues the sound technician as Lizzie reenters the room.

LIZZIE  
(to Miranda)  
We need to talk. Like now.

Not giving her any time to argue, Lizzie grabs Miranda by the hand and drags her out into the hall.

CUT TO:  
INT. RECORDING STUDIO-HALLWAY-DAY

MIRANDA  
What're you doing? They're waiting for you in there.

LIZZIE  
This is more important.  
(beat)  
Are you jealous of me?

MIRANDA  
What?

LIZZIE  
Because Gordo said you are.  
(beat)  
Miranda, I can't help what's happened to me. I'm sorry you weren't the one who's gotten the chance of a lifetime. I didn't ask for any of this.

MIRANDA  
(resentment boiling over)  
Didn't you? Isn't this what you always wanted? What we always wanted? To be one of the popular crowd. To have a talent, a purpose?

LIZZIE  
That's right Miranda. What we've always wanted. We've both wanted to be recognized.

MIRANDA  
But not for the same thing Lizzie!  
(beat)  
Do you know how long it took me to find out I was good at something? Try my whole life!

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
Please. Your whole life? What about my whole life!

MIRANDA  
It's always been about you Lizzie, ever since preschool. And that's fine. But this was mine. Music was my special gift. And after I finally find it, here you come and take it.

LIZZIE  
No one can 'take' your talent Miranda.

MIRANDA  
Oh no? Then what would you call it?

Lizzie rubs her eyes to compose herself.

LIZZIE  
Do you remember when we both had a crush on that substitute teacher, Mr. Keith?

MIRANDA  
Yeah...

LIZZIE  
Well, do you remember when we promised never to fight over someone again? That our friendship meant more to us?

MIRANDA  
Yeah...

LIZZIE  
Well, this is the same thing. But instead of a guy, we're fighting over a talent.

LIZZIE (CON'T)  
Neither one of us can claim 'dibs' on it, because it isn't ours. So us fighting over it is stupid.

MIRANDA  
(disgruntled)  
Stupid huh?

LIZZIE  
Yes, stupid. Friends should support each other-isn't that what you said?

CLIP: MOVIN' ON UP  
Miranda telling Lizzie that friends should be happy for one another.

BACK TO SCENE

LIZZIE (CON'T)  
You were right. We should support one another.  
(beat)  
Right?

Lizzie looks earnestly/imploringly at Miranda, who is still undecided.

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
Right!

MIRANDA  
(reluctantly)  
I guess so...

Lizzie takes Miranda's hand.

LIZZIE  
Miranda, we're best friends. I'd never knowingly do something that would hurt you.

Lizzie takes a deep breath.

LIZZIE (CON'T)  
If-If this is going to be a problem for you-for us-I-I'll give it up...

Miranda goggles at her.

LIZZIE (CON'T)  
I-I'll just have to find something else I'm good at.

ANIMATED LIZZIE  
How about bowling? I'm good at that!

LIZZIE  
Say the word and I'll go in there and call all of this off.

Both girls are silent while Lizzie's career hangs in the balance.

MIRANDA  
Lizzie...

LIZZIE  
(nervously)  
Y-Yeah?

MIRANDA  
(smiling)  
I talk too much. Let's get back in there.

Relieved, a smiling Lizzie leads Miranda back into the recording room.

CUT TO:  
INT. RECORDING STUDIO-RECORDING ROOM-DAY

LIZZIE  
There's been a change of plans.

Lizzie leads Miranda into the recording booth with her.

CUT TO:  
INT. RECORDING STUDIO-RECORDING BOOTH

LIZZIE  
This song's going to a duet. And this-it's gone.

Lizzie tosses the prearranged music sheet away. She then hurriedly whispers into Miranda's ear. The plan all set, the duo launch into a song. Something to do with friendship. "Friendship" by Cole Porter or "You've Got a Friend In Me" by Randy Newman; something along that vein.

And we pan away as the two girls are friends once more.

CUT TO:  
INT. MIDDLE SCHOOL-HALLWAY-DAY

Matt and Lanny are engaged in a "probability pool scenario" with a group of kids-in other words, Matt's gambling (like he was in "Gordo and the Girl").

Crouched behind a trashcan, taking it all in is Patricia. As she's kneeling there, Principal Tweedy comes up behind her.

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
I hope you have a good reason for calling me down here Miss Farnsworth. I was in an important meeting.

Patricia yanks Principal Tweedy down behind the trashcan with her. She points to Matt and the group of kids.

PATRICIA  
(fervently)  
See that?  
(beat)  
Gambling!

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
That's a very serious charge.

PATRICIA  
(wickedly)  
I know.

The two walk over to the scene of the crime. The other kids, seeing the principal coming, take off-leaving Matt and Lanny to hold the preverbal 'bag'.

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY What's going on here?  
(eyes money)  
That looks like money Mr. McGuire.

MATT  
(scrambling)  
That's, uh, because it is...?

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
What's it for?

MATT  
For?

Matt looks franticly to Lanny while Patricia gloats.

MATT  
(inspired)  
It's, uh, for the new cafeteria wing! Yeah, that's it. Me and Lanny wanted to help anyway we could, so we've been collecting money from our fellow students.  
(beat)  
You know what they say. A student body marches on its stomach!

Principal Tweedy looks on proudly as Patricia is incredulous.

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
That is a noble and worthwhile gesture Mr. McGuire.

He turns to Patricia.

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
Now, aren't you ashamed? Instead of accusing your classmates of misconduct Miss Farnsworth, you'd do better to emulate them. I believe you owe these boys an apology.

PATRICIA  
What!

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
I want you to apologize to them.  
(beat)  
Now.

PATRICIA  
But-I-they-

She trails off at the principal's steely gaze. All the while Matt and Lanny can barely contain their glee.

PATRICIA  
(through gritted teeth)  
I-I'm sorry...

MATT  
(grandiose)  
Apology accepted.

Lanny agrees.

PRINCIPAL TWEEDY  
Now Mr. McGuire, if you could tell me what you have in mind...

The three males walk away chummy, leaving Patricia by herself, thwarted again.

CLOSE ON: Patricia screaming in frustration.

FADE OUT:

END OF EPISODE


End file.
